Savoring simple daily pleasures
Embracing your Queenager as we navigate perimenopause:
Lately, its occurred to me that while women- including myself and the vast majority of my peers- are embracing a new found comradery, extensive medical and nutritional information and support during their various menopausal stages, there is also an element of scaremongering which must be rather daunting for younger woman who are some years away from even thinking about this stage in their lives.
I remember as a young pregnant soon to be Mother, whishing people wouldn't take such pleasure in telling me their horror birth stories- carrying a baby, growing a new human and wrapping your head around actually giving birth, let alone parenthood is so enormous- why do other women (And occasionally men too) take such alacrity in shocking you with all the gory details of their journey?!
SO, todays post is intended to put a fresh, positive spin on "the change" and whether you are in the throws of perimenopause, a twenty something sprightly thing, or an experienced seasoned "Queenager", there is joy, beauty and energy to be found, and embraced in these transitional years.
I took a longer walk than usual this morning, the weather was just too glorious not to make the most of, and while I had a list of weekend chores to get stuck into, I was so, so happy to be out in the sunshine, savoring the beauty of a sparkling autumnal morning.
As I walked along at a brisk pace, it occurred to me, and not for the first time, that despite my advancing years, I can honestly say I have never felt stronger, fitter, more contented or so tuned into my true self than I do at this stage of my life. I had a literal spring in my step as I began to write this weeks post in my head , bursting with the desire to share the joy and vibrancy of, well, LIFE. Everydays. Seeking the things that bring us joy and not allowing ourselves to feel guilty for doing so.
Reaching our late forties and early fifties is not how it was in my grandmothers day, we are not past it, soon to retire, pinny wearing, blue rinsed fuddy duddys! (Nor was my grandmother but you get the sentiment) We are the tip of the spear of social change in this developing society- women at this stage in life are just coming into their prime- with experience, knowledge and a deeper understanding of who they are and their self-worth. while there is still along way to go in terms of gender equality, we have forged new paths that our courageous daughters will expand and fortify.
I like to imagine entering the perimenopause as a wintering- but after winter comes spring. And we get to have another season, another glorious spring- if we take care of ourselves, listen to our bodies and trust our inner compass.
So yes, the years of perimenopause can be tough for many women, myself included, and it may involve over coming challenges we've never had to face- sleepless nights, hot flashes, and anxiety- we can absolutely come through it, and even have many moments of joy and happiness while we navigate the stormy waters of hormone fluctuation. Reassured that is isn't taboo to mention it now, there are facilities, resources and support out there from homeopathic drops to good diet, friendships to HRT- and through this journey you'll find an inner strength and fierceness you didn't know you possessed. And in those darkest of wintry moments is when the new shoots of spring, and promise, reach out their vibrant green tendrils and seek the light and warmth of the sun. Think of pruning and cutting back your shrubs and perennial plants, getting rid of the dead wood and straggly stems, to allow for new fresh growth.
The wintering is maybe only our body's way of restoring and regenerating so that we are ready, equipped and energized for the next chapter- or season-of our lives. Post menopausal- which may yet be half our life still to lead! Certainly not the beginning of the end!
We owe death a living first- surely!? Think of all the wonderful pioneering women paving the way before us, making it ok to age, that wrinkles can be beautiful, grey hair attractive, and that life after 50 can be even more fun, fulfilling and meaningful that the previous years even.
So, while I absolutely advocate and encourage you to be informed, and knowledgeable about what your bodies going though, how to make that transition as smooth as possible for you personally and how to equip yourself to deal with the bumpy bits as best you can- don't fear it. Its puberty in reverse but its kind of even better. we get to rediscover ourselves all over again with the maturity and experience to embrace it, savor it and then fully and completely and unapologetically live it.
Picture a ski slope with all the Criss cross tracks and groves cut into the snow by a day's activity of all those skis and boards travelling down it until dusk. Now picture a thick, powdery silent dump of fresh snow, covering all those trails so that come morning, nothing but deep fresh pristine powder is visible. Yesterday's tracks are still underneath, but you get to carve out a fresh path and cut through that beautiful glistening powder however you wish to first- today.
Don't fear this stage of your life, and don't let others scare you into dreading it. Embrace this part of the journey, learn, become informed, read, share, give yourself space to change and permission to forge your own pathways.
Savor the joys and the little things along the way and enjoy creating the life you want to live each day. Secure, grounded and vibrant in the space you occupy as the best version of you yet.
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