Savoring simple everyday pleasures

It has been fairly challenging this past week- and not necessarily in a negative way but new feelings and having somewhat confronting emotions paired with less than ideal sleep and a full working week.

But it has given me a unique opportunity for self growth, to learn though experience and to savor and relish, even more than I usually do, the moments of quiet and solitude.

After an early start (5am) most days, a workout then general household chores like laundry, making lunches, preparing element of the evening meal and straightening up the house before setting out for the day, I prefer to walk to work. Occasionally I have to drive due to sever weather, (a little rain doesn't bother me)  time constraints, or heavy items to tote in with me, but more often than not I chose to walk. After the organized chaos and busyness of our household starting their school and work days, the 20-25 minute walk to my place of work enables me to regroup, focus, breathe and feel prepared.

 I really noticed this week as emotions ran high at home, that the quiet pockets between the passing cars, or messages pinging, or locals greeting me as they also start their day, we so special and beautiful they made me smile broadly as I walked. The song and trill and call of the various birds seemed to be magnified and like a special piece of music being created for me to remain present, positive and calm. 

The more I noticed these brief moments, the more of them I discovered throughout my days. I like to be conscious of my surrounding and I certainly intentional draw a peace and stillness from nature each and every day, but this seemed different. It seemed the universe was tuning me in, creating these little instants to continuously and consistently ground me. Allowing me to experience my emotions without out the over whelm, think though the issues or scenarios without the angst, and feel guided and as though I was being gently carried through my day- being exactly where I was meant to be. 

The world seems vast and tiny all at the same time for me and the juxtaposition is a little fragile. While my elder daughter is on the other side of the world having life changing experiences, I too (We too, as the three of us left behind- our youngest, my husband and myself) are feeling the miles in our own ways and interpretations. Evoking memories of travel, adventure, cultures, childhood, holidays and homesickness. I finally appreciate fully how our families, in particular my darling Mother, felt when we ventured into the big wide world as teens- in the days long before what communications are today, and video calls were reserved for sci fi movies. 

I have also found a sense of wisdom, under the raw emotions, and a deep, deep understanding of the passing of time, of life's rich weaving of experiences and emotions and space, and our place within those. these quiet pauses during my days of tuning into the birds and sounds of nature have aided me and enveloped me with a sense of belonging and peace I so needed. Letting me slowly and gently process the turmoil in my head. 

I'll be open that its been tough- a true roller coaster of tears, relief, laughter, confidence, anxiety and apprehension. But even this relatively short time has taught me so much, about myself, my relationships with family, the unwavering support and unconditional love of my husband, the value of true friendship and a trusted support network and community, of skeletons I may still need to deal with in my dusty closet, and of complete faith. 

I feel like a fog has lifted somewhat and I can see a clearer path as to who I truly am, and where I am headed. Its renewed my ambition, given me clarity and elevated my mindset. There's even a frission of excitement about what the future can hold. 

It was an exhausting, but necessary week, for me to learn a little more about myself and to grow. The birds were my soundtrack, and a spirit lifting one at that. I topped off my long week with a pot of tea and finishing the novel I was reading curled up on our big sofa after walking home from work. A little luxury I rarely have the opportunity for at that time of day- or allow myself. 

SO, while looking forward to a fun and social evening we have planned tonight with some friends, I am headed out to get a second dose of fresh air and bird song for the day, and to allow a peace to fill my lungs and the melodies to fill my ears. 

Oooh AND fresh linen on the bed waiting to climb into after a fun soiree X

No Buy Year- another minor whoopsie- a cashmere sweater in a charity shop/ good will for less than $20...... I couldn't very well leave it there! 

 Savoring Simple Everyday Pleasures

It was during a recent walk - I loop I frequent regularly around the local neighborhood and down the to beach- an unexpected clarity descended on me, bringing with it a sense of peace and belonging. 

I had chosen to walk without listening to a podcast or audio book this particular day, and happily tuned into the quiet sounds of nature and the distant buzz of my communities everyday life around me. A distant hummm of a lawnmower,  a far off tapping of a hammer, a plethora of bird song and the odd purr of a passing car. 

I was filled with a sense of over whelming gratitude and a calm balance and focus. A truly appreciative  acceptance of my place in this world - both in the physical space I occupy and the present moment. This came in such a rush of emotion and took me by such a surprise - in my tracks almost - as the tranquility and stillness of the moment settled upon me and I felt I could breathe deeply. 

I experienced this on a morning barely 24 hours after my "little girl" had flown to the other side of the world- alone, and I was not only sleep deprived having tracked her flight throughout the night but, naturally an anxious mama. It was almost as if everything came into focus and a weight physically lifted from my shoulders. I could feel beneath my feet my place on this globe and the sensation of all being well washed over me in a welcome wave. 

It is so vital we give ourselves the opportunities to pause and reflect. To allow our minds the space to process and think deeply, letting thoughts swirl and penetrate and at the same time allowing others to pass through and be discarded or dealt with or acknowledged. 

Its easy for us to fall into the busy trap of flitting from one task to the next, hopping between to-do lists, and I am guilty of this at times too, but we do need to remind ourselves to pause. To take stock, practice gratitude and to be still. 

This circles back to mother nature again and being conscious of being present, noticing the little things. I promise, once you allow yourself to pause, these things come into focus without having to try too hard. It becomes a habit, naturally, and a sense of space and peace you look forward to.  

Lack of sleep can pay havoc with our minds, and while I am an advocate for a good long restorative 8 hours, we all experience nights when sleep doesn't come for whatever reason. Be gentle with yourself. Listen to your body. And listening to your body, not your mind, is crucial on these days- If I've had a disturbed night, I crave coffee, sugar and carbs and have a seemingly insatiable appetite. But if you try super hard to tune out that voice, what you actually need is to be gently nurtured, not jarred with caffeine and sugar and spiking and crashing insulin levels! If you can resist and help your poor tired self with plenty of fluids, minimal caffeine, plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables and protein, plus some time outdoors, you will undoubtedly feel better and recover quicker. Plus, setting you up and equipping you for a better nights rest the next night. 

To clarify, solitude isn't loneliness. Solitude is, in my opinion, a necessary piece of the patchwork of life. Allowing ourselves the time is not a luxury and it is certainly not a punishment. Its like ongoing maintenance and heeling. Being alone doesn't have to feel bereft of company- and shouldn't- and it doesn't need to be for lengthy periods of time. I find my daily walks and a peppering of being "home alone" to potter while the rest of the household is out doing whatever throughout the week, is enough for me to have a little head space, time to think, process, write and just absorb the peace. It recharges me enough and brings me back to the present and a place of gratitude to continue my role of busy working mum, while still loving my life and keeping any overwhelm in check. 

Start small if this is new to you, pop the kettle on for a pot of tea and light a candle, sit and savor your cup of tea in peace and quiet rather than rushing and slurping while multitasking. The magic will happen if you give it just the tiniest space to flourish. 

 

 Savoring simple daily pleasures

It is, more often than not, the simplest of things that afford such pleasure or feelings of gratitude and fullness. 

 In just the last 12-24 hours, I have been so fortunate to experience a cluster of these such experiences:

Walking to the village on a sparkling frosty morning for coffee was the start to my day yesterday.

A sunny crisp afternoon 9 holes on a lush green course amongst the long shadows with a group of wonderful ladies and many birds keeping us company on the greens.

An early hot shower yesterday evening, and after a movie in front of a crackling fire with the family, and I was tucked up in bed with my book and a snuggly kitty before 9pm. 

An early walk this morning again with a group of ladies just after the sun rose in frigid temperatures but with plenty of laughs, companionship, splendid views and bright sunshine- and two happy dogs in tow.

Upon returning, hanging my freshly laundered bed linens on the line and stopping to watch the hawk circling and calling way over head and swooping low so I could even make out the markings on his breast feathers. I felt privileged to be present in that moment. standing on my lawn with an armful of damp sheets and a first full of wooden dolly pegs- stopped still watching in awe. 

And just a few moments ago, making an oat milk flat white coffee in a Spode mug, to sit at my peaceful sunny desk and notice a rejuvenated orchid bursting with no less than 14 new buds and one beautiful pure white bloom. 

Arguably, none of these things cost per se. (or not in those moments, as for the golf) and yet the pleasure derived from the experiences, the uplift in mood setting a vibe for the day, and the valuable reminder to pause, be fully present, and enjoy these moments. 

I feel so blessed to be surrounded with wonderful friends and supportive loving family, to feel the sun on my face and the sparkle of frost, and to be someone who looks for the good, the positive, the beauty and the uniqueness of everydays. 

With that said, I'm keeping this post brief this week, and I am choosing to gently potter through my weekend, getting tasks accomplished but with no sense of pressure or duty, and relaxing into time with my family before "my baby" takes off for an adventure on the other side of the world. 

 Savoring simple daily pleasures

I have just walked back into my sun filled cozy home, with the fire still burning in the hearth- lit before dawn, from a long, frosty and unimaginably beautiful walk. It was a true winter wonderland out there - something here in the upper North Island we don't experience that frequently in winter. The course I took for my delicious coffee pause in the village was around 9Km, and while it mostly followed the road, a large park and lots of green space boarders the route and some wide expansive views across trees to the water. 

I was genuinely thrilled to be fortunate enough to experience such an outrageously beautiful morning, and countless picturesque vignettes.  I felt exhilarated and with each fridged breath felt my heart soar a little higher and my well of gratitude fill to the very brim.  I wish I could bottle that feeling and bring it out when I need it. Everything felt right with the world and I felt so at peace. And so incredibly blessed and content. 

While we are navigating some bumpy territory as a family at present, and doing our best to remain positive and grounded, when I'm walking out in nature- (whatever the weather but on a breathtakingly beautiful morning as this even more so-) You cannot but be in the present moment. Absorbing the delights of the season and mother nature's magic asks of you, very persuasively, to be here in the now. In these rich moments it would require a conscious effort to dwell on the past or think too much of the future. As I walk in these surroundings, one foot in front of the other, no distractions, not even a breeze, just bird song, I know, deep, deep down, that everything will work out. It is all happening for a reason. And I am right here in this exact moment, exactly where I should be. 

It is these vital times, this space we afford ourselves regularly, that provides an environment and mindset for the grounding and reflection we need. Some may find this space in other ways and from different sources, but as a self diagnosed HSP (highly sensitive person) and an extroverted introvert- I love the company of others, but I need to have the ability to dial it back afterwards and have time alone, to recharge, digest and reset. 

We have a home which is well set up for entertaining (Not that that is required to entertain but it helps! We have lived in far smaller homes and still filled it with the company of family and friends regularly) And I love to entertain- I enjoy cooking and hosting, planning, creating - lighting candles, or the open fire or the Barbecue, polishing glassware, placing fresh towels in the powder room, fresh flowers in the entrance way, re stocking amenities so guest feel welcome and catered for, and preparing food and drinks to delight and satiate. But I have also learned I need to top myself back up after these events or gatherings. I have an inbuilt expectation how long these things may go for, and when approach that boundary I start to feel drained not enlivened. I know I need time alone to process and refuel afterwards- even after a casual coffee, or a full blown 5 course late dinner and house guests. 

Partly, this may be to do with age and maturity, but I seem to recall always feeling a little like this. These days it is also comforting to know I am not alone- through a likeminded on line community, various authors and bloggers I follow, and friends- who feel just the same. I was delighted to discover a lovely girlfriend of mine was tickled we had tickets to a matinee performance in the city, as it meant we could enjoy lunch out and the show and still both be home for a relaxing shower, an easy supper (A rare "naughty" treat of granola and yoghurt for dinner!) and some peaceful restorative quiet time before bed. 

It is important to know your own social boundaries and your expectations- don't let others set those for you. Your needs are yours. When extending invitations or making plans - be clear on a time frame. If needs be, give yourself a get out.

"Do pop in for coffee- 10.30am would be great as we have to head out just before 12"

"We'd love you to come for a casual dinner, lets eat early as its a school night so come around 5.30pm"

"Shall we meet for afternoon tea then we can all be home and cosy before it gets dark and cold?"

You can still be a perfect, gracious hostess, just within the limitations of your energy levels, so hosting wont leave you anxious and fatigued, but allow you to thoroughly enjoy company. Even when My dear Mother comes for dinner, I enjoy the alone time doing the dishes and resetting the kitchen at the end of the evening- having always treasured her time with us all. 

I am feeling energized and uplifted after my dreamy morning;

Waking before my alarm (always so much more refreshing that an abrupt awakening- especially if its very dark and sub zero outside!) 

A tall glass of water with a squeeze of lemon before a strong black coffee as the fire crackled into life and the shapes of the silhouetted tress began to take form outside the windows. 

Hanging white, freshly laundered sheets on the line at first light with numb fingers, then my revitalizing and inspiring walk- punctuated with a delicious warming oat milk coffee.

And home to my sunny warm sanctuary, affectionate kitties, a nourishing breakfast, and a gentle hour of peace and tranquility in which to write. 

A pretty perfect start to the weekend. A heart filled with gratitude, fresh linen on the bed, a warm, tidy and inviting home, and after a round of golf with the ladies this afternoon in the sun, a good book to cozy up with by the fire this evening. My coffee was $7. The rest of this glorious day is priceless.